Fuck That Hoe Shit! (Doo Doo on haters.)

Just came from the new free shrinkman. It's a slight pain in my ass to have to explain all about myself, all over again. We be tryin to figure out random shit like "Why do people be hittin me up for advice on relationships when I have the worst taste in men? Is it because I know how to recognize the bad ones? Hmmmm?" Fucks it.

I woke up yesterday mornin, real peppy like. I'd spent the night before talking to a guy that my friend suggested I might click with and lo and behold, E is smart cuz we did jie click. Talked for almost 2 hrs and it was nice. Real nice.


So I was pretty fuckin pleased wakin up this morning until I hear this shit on the radio.

Random ass commercial with a woman saying "Just cuz I'm living with HIV doesn't mean I have to live in fear."

Come tha fuck on DAWG!!!! It's 8am on a Tuesday,!!!! Are you trying to blow my whole fuckin day? Damn!

Go to work and get it poppin. Got a package midday. Let me explain how lazy I am.

I woke up last Saturday and decided I wanted diamonds but I really didnt want to have to leave my bed. So I roll my ass over and go on Zales and check out my 4 C's (Cut, Color, Clarity, and Carat). Then I order some diamond Earrings. I'm a Bamma. But they came and they look hot. Gotta spoil yourself sometimes. Beats waitin for someone else to do it.


You Love me Cuz I got my OWWWWNNN...


Got home, put in my earrings, talked to the new guy and worked out. This would have actually went up yesterday had I not stayed on the phone til 2am talking to him. He be funny but he live in Brooklyn. Damn imports. So now my sorry ass all up on Facebook starin real hard, tryin to figure out if he's packin. Me thinks he might be. I'm a dawg. What can I say?

Workouts are hella important. At this point, I'm fighting time, gravity, lifestyle and biological predisposition to weight gain. So I kick it like Tai Bo. Thank god for Crunches. Thank god.

Rannnndoms

  • You know you fuckin up:
    If you get your heart broken (ie. you cryin and shit) 3 times a year or more....you fuckin up.

    If you let the same nigga break yo heart 3 times or more... Lmao you definitely Fucking up.You should be at least reticent at this point.

    If you sweatin a dude that kicked you to the curb... You fuckin up.

    If you settle for a niggas heart without his fidelity, talkin bout how he knows where home is.... You fuckin up.

    I reserve the right to say this shit cuz I have fucked up in all the above scenarios...

  • Ignant Shit I said recently:

    "It may make me a dog but nothings better than dick cept new dick. It just aint...."

    "I'd totally wife him, if he wasn't a hoe. I really would...."

    "I like this hat. It makes a statement. It says "I own a hat". Yeah."

    Post Cocktails: "Just because I cannot write well does not mean that I can't read or drive...."

    "Fuck that Hoe shit"

  • Why is it that men seem to have more sexual stamina in the summer? Its hot and it just aint fair...

  • Peep my new fave movie: State Property 2


  • The more I think about it, the less I want kids.

    Easter Sunday, I was witness to an 11 year old at church in a drop waist dress with a full face of makeup. No bueno.

  • Heard it all before



    I used to bump this song all the time in College. Shit. Still do. Benefit of the doubt...

    This why Mami don't neva give nobody tha benefit of the doubt... I'll give you doubt.. but ain't no benefit in that. If it smell funny, it tends to be bullshit...

  • If you annoy me, I will delete you out my phone. That's not crazy. That's Self preservation.


  • If you hollarin at somebody and the first 3 months are difficult, run. Life's too short and them first 3 months supposed to be rainbows and puppies and cupcakes. If it's mad work in the first 3 months, fuck that shit gonna look like in 3 years. bullshit.

  • Where tha Lumberjacks at? Wit tha plaid and tha beards and shit?


Off to Kstreeeeet.

Comments

Ms. Burt said…
Umm... I think I call you on relationship problems cause you're my white angle... I know if Netta says no, I really shouldn't do it. I'm not sure if that should scare you or not.

And that 11 year old... no bueno.

And the song I used to bump through out college, Jada Kiss, "We Gon Make It"

I think all your Ignant Shyt said... I've said to. Daymn, SmH.

Oh and I'm hoping that since it's Spring/Summer, and men have more stamina... I can get more ass... Ready to break the celibacy shyt.
23/4/09 7:24 AM
Melissa said…
Completely agree on the three months! That's the puppy love stage!
24/4/09 5:29 PM
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