Showing posts from June, 2009

When Sex leads to Scars

This title sounds super dramatic. Like it’s about rapery or something unfun and emotional scars… It totally isn’t. This blog is NOT about "echoing my souls pain" or some shit like that. I am not a fucking EMO high schooler. I am a grown woman... wit bills and shit!!!

Thursday afternoon, I got sick. I went home early and passed the fuck out. Note to readers: catching the bus any time around 5 pm aint a good look. Everyone was an asshole.

So I get home and get my sleep on and I wake up Friday with every muscle in my body hurting. I dunno. I can't call it. Mighta been swine flu. I Blackberry in sick and go back to sleep. I wake up and eat something. I take a Klonopin and go back to sleep. At this point, Sick feels awesome. I am doped up on cold meds and Klonopin and I am on a sick floaty cloud. At this point, I would have recommended illness to anyone who asked. I was out of it.

I kept getting random texts from POA (Pieces of Ass)... 22, and 23, and 2 other people.....

I dist…

Some truths that I have come to....

Now first off, I'm pissed that Mediatakeout ain't hit me off with this info before I got a text on that shit from random mofos. Mediatakeout.... yall fuckin up.

I need Michael Jackson to live for the following reasons:
I cannot stomach the marathon of old shit they gonna play right after he passes.

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW BIG HIS CATALOG OF MUSIC IS? And I just cannot deal with havin to listen to Thriller or Billie Jean 8 times a day. I CANNOT.

I don't feel like listenin to everyone pretend like he ain't touch them kids.

Now, don't get me wrong.... He is a great and well accomplished artist. But that don't change the fact that he touched them kids. Nor does the fact that he touched them kids alert the fact that he was a great musician..

All I know is this:
Michael touched them kids and ain't never had sexual intercourse with a woman eva.

OJ Killed them people.
I thought he was funny in them movies. I'm sure he was a great football player and all... But afte…

Happy Wednesday


Fucked up shit pops off in DC, Life decisions are made as a result.

So, errybody in DC knows what had popped off.

2 metro trains collided. Not tapped each other. Not a fuckin bump. No fender bender type shit.

This is what had occurred:

Hmmm. Something like 7 dead. 70 or so people injured.

So the night is coming to an end and I'm thinkin.... I'm thinkin bout Ole Boy and how time is short and how I really would like to be with him..... People die everyday... Blah Blah Blah...

So, I call him. No answer.

Mind you, had he gave a hot damn... He'd have called me first. I coulda been dead round this bitch! Yall know I ride the mothafuckin red line!!!!

So this morning, I hit him up again.... Still no answer.

This afternoon rolls around and it's a wrap. He ain't hit me back. Fuck it.

I ain't the one (shakes head vigorously). I'm a boss bitch.

My jobs on point. I'm Educated. I know my way around sex organs. I look DAMN GOOD. I'm Intelligent and I have a good head on my shoulders. I'm not the motherfuckin one.

I'll be damn…

Extracurricular fuckin leads to problems (This is J, Everyday. I never change.)

The topic of cheating keeps on popping up in the world. I don't really do the whole cheating thing cuz I personally believe that one significant other is enough of a headache. Cheating is like asking for an embolism. Even tho I don't really do the cheating thing, I do feel some kinda way about the topic...

Cheating (in my opinion) has not occurred if there has not been any penetration.
Blow jobs - Cheating.
Dry humping - Bad Idea, but not technically cheating.
Hand job - Not cheating
Anal - Cheating...

You get the idea. And while a hand job isn't cheating... If that hand job manages to segue into a blow job.... Problems.

Never tell your jump off that he is better in bed than your man.

First off, that's Hella disrespectful. That's almost worse than the actual cheating.

Second, Don't think you can tell him that shit and not fuck up the power equation in your situation. Iffin he thinks he's doin something, he'll thing he has that ass on lock. Next thing …

Yves Saint Laurent Strappy Platform Sandals....

Yves Saint Laurent - Strappy Platform Sandals (Lola)

These are mine.
I lusted after them and when I finally got up the balls to buy them... Sold out. Then I found the blue ones on sale... Mine. No more shoe regrets.

Yves Saint Laurent
Strappy Platform Sandals

Metallic leather straps wrap around a patent leather heel for added drama.
Heel, 5¼"
Two adjustable ankle straps
Leather lining and sole
Made in Italy

No more shoe regrets... hope I don't break my neck.

Tha muthafuckin secret!!!!

I was talkin to this chick on Blackberry messenger the other day. She said some ill ass shit. I shall share.

She said:
No matter what the difficulty is or who is involved you stay true mentaly to the outcome you wish to see. ...but you always decide what you want, you're asking the universe for anything you want. 2nd you believe that its yours from that second, because the Universe has everything and will always respond to your commands if--» 3rd you align yourself with what you want through feeling that you already have it.

This shit took at least 24 hours to sink into my head.... Actually that was wine/beer/Kristy and Ebo's faults. Debauchery occurred and I managed to smile easy for the first time in a minute.

So I woke up this morning with my normal(possibly lethal) combination of Wellbutrin plus 2 caffeine pills (just so i can get out of bed in the mornings) and tossed on top of that a half of a Klonopin. I walked out of my door and things were...ok.

I went to work and it w…

and its open....

My brain is working differently today. We open again. OPEN!

Two tears in a bucket, Fuck it.

And it happened again… My sex drive died. Perhaps its because I’m dealing with too many different things but at this point… I am tired and want no parts of man parts. I want to nap. And drink tequila. And loiter the best I can.

The BK saga continues. I broke things off (I guess) on Saturday… Which lead him to contract me aloooot on Sunday. He conveniently ignores shit that he doesn’t want to hear. Things like, “I can’t and won’t put up with this situation anymore….” or “I’m really mad at you.” Apparently he doesn’t engage in things like that. It’s oddly comforting and also bewildering… He’ll be like “Yeah, I saw your message but I really didn’t read it. I just called you instead….” What the fuck?

At this point, I’m tired of trying or caring or something. Im just tired.

We talked for a long time last night about random shit, but 3 weeks of neglect made me feel a disconnect, like the bond that was forming has been severely damaged. Its like not watering a plant for 3 weeks and the poppin…

Don't dress Dick up like a relationship..... Keep Dick Honest.

Last weekend I dipped out to NJ.

Sos I was headed to NJ friday night and I was thinking about the butterfly effect and Chaos theory and the Domino effect and who you know and who you meet and the interwoven connections that you make throughout your life and the need for meaningful human interaction and contact and I was so deep in thought that my punk ass almost ran out of gas.

Here's how it went:
On the NJ turnpike there are only about 3 fucking rest stops between the beginning and exit 7a. I passed the 1st one and said "Fuck it. I got a quarter of a tank. I can make it to the next stop."

Did I mention that these rest stops are like 15 to 30 mins apart? Sos I'm Driving and we hit a point where I am too far to turn around and go back but I am also too far from gas and the needle is riding on E. What THE FUCK? Bad planning on my part.

Sos I turn to the GPS hoe and go "GPS. Show me gas."

Gps says that there is gas 1.5 miles from me.... Ok GPS. Lets make gas hap…