Deez Hoes is Gods Gift Like Christmas

Tuesday afternoon, I could not have felt more Charlie Brown. I had this plan about how I was going to go home before I picked him up... Get my car, Get SUPER CUTE and then whisk him away. Everytime I tried to leave work... No Go. Something else popped up.

His bus got in at 7:30 and I left work at 7:10. So I get to Chinatown and am trying to find the Megabus stop... Which I can't. We finally connect via text and he says he is inside the Starbucks. So I walk over and look in the window and lo and behold, there sits my Prince. Big cornball ass smiles, one of those long lingering hugs and an assessment of his hunger level and we are off, hand in hand, headed to Mai Thai, with me explaining the whole time how I had planned to get cute and all....

Food at Mai Thai was ok. Convo was on point. Flirtatious glance across the table were great. Snap up a cab after dinner and go home to some wine and relaxation.

I am not going to talk about the bizness... cuz it ain't none yall business... cept to say, shit is straight and I was thus pleased...

Talked, laughed, kissed and held hands and all that type gay shit. It was nice. He is nice. I was quite sad to see him go Thursday. Quite sad.

Now, negotiations are currently in the works for monogamy. But yall know, I dont believe in Puttin the Pussy on Layaway, so until he says those magic ass words... I gotta do me, tho I am in the process of Closeouts. Yall know "Oh So Sexy" is here.

Q: Do I feel guitly?
A: A lil bit. Dude is just bout perfect... I'd totally carry a fetus for him.

Q: Would I regret not smashin (specially if there was a breakdown in negotiations and we hit an impasse and ceased negotiations)?

A: Hells yeah...

Its summer and I swear to you, these dudes are hoes. I feel like Tyrone Biggums at a 5 O'clock free crack giveaway.... I be running around like "THESE DUDES IS GIVING AWAY FREE DICK!!!



Now, I know I aint shit. I am an asshole.

• I've messed with other peoples men before.
  
  If I don't know you, and your man's a hoe... Well, Deez Hoes is God's gift like Christmas. Me not smashing aint gonna make him not a hoe. Like Mob Deep says, "A Hoe's gonna be a hoe." You can't wife these hoes. You can't cuff these hoes. Let hoes roam, Dammit.
  
  Additionally, if you think I fucked ya man:
  
  A) You might be right, and
  
  B) You better never step to me with that shit. Holla at ya hoe ass man.
  
  You and I ain't got no rings, no contracts. But when you enter into a relationship with someone, that serves as a contract betwixt the two of you that he won't put his dick in nothin but you. Lodge a complaint with your relationship union delegate if it pleases ye.
  
  
• I don't like turnin down shit I want.
  
  I just dont. Never have. Never will. It's bound to be my downfall, but fuck it. The Devil You Know is better than the Devil that you don't know.
  
  
• I sometimes forget shit I shouldn't.
  
  My homegirl turned to me the other day and said "Remember that time we fucked?"
  
  SAY WHAT? Not at all. Tho she does have a fatty and is quite a bit fine so I ain't super surprised but it'd be nice to remember. I killed alot of brain cells over the years. My bad
  
  
• All in all, I feel like this:
  
  Me amending my sexual activity because the verbal intent to get very serious in the future is put out there is like me being an alcoholic and someone saying "Ayo. Quit drinkin. We fittin to go to AA real soon" and then I quit drinking.
  
  What if we never make it to AA? What then? I coulda been drinkin that whole motherfuckin time. Holla at me when you outside wit tha car ready. How bout you do that? Til then....
  
  DEEZ Hoes Is God's Gift Like Christmas.

Loves great and all but I'm a dog. So til shit gets EXTRA Official, I'm a free agent. Real Talk.



Ps: This is what I'm watching right now. Ain't half bad.