Strippers and Freestylin.... (Election Edition Randoms!)

Amusingdoms:

• It's strange how people come across this blog. Some of these google searches are off the chain. Someone came upon this blog by searching for : fuck your tight wet pussy tonight poem. Interesting. Another one... "How to buy cigarettes"
  
  
• Went to the strip club the other day. Two really interesting things happened:
  
  1. A guy outside tried to sell me and my friend a Centrum. Yes that's right.... A single multi-vitamin.....
     
     
  2. One of the strippers on stage had a tampon string hanging out. It was disturbing. I am still a lil traumatized.
  
  Also, I realized that gettin paid to shake my Vag in someones face might be where it's at. I might need to make that move to pay my way through Grad school.
  
  
• My neighborhood is off the chain.
  
  1. There is a guy running around (who lives in the neighborhood) pulling licks on women and children in broad fucking daylight. Apparently he just got out of jail... I am certain he will be going back real soon. Now I gotta have motherfuckers walk me to and from my car.
     
     
  2. The other day, I walked outside and saw this laying on the sidewalk:
     
     
     Damn.
     
     
  3. A guy jumped on the bus the other day and said "I got Newports. Five dollars. When u see me, get at me. Wayne! weeooh weeeoohh weeee.... Like a cop car. Yeah. That's how we get down!"
     
     
  4. There was this 50 year old dude on the bus Freestyling. Wait for it... Wait for it....
     

     She like big thing things, diamond rings and thing things things that go bling bling big shiny things and things. Ring my bell. Ding dong.

     
     
     Yeah.
     
  
  
  
• This is what my foot looked like, post accident:
  
  
  
  
• I had disowned my "Party Girl" ways. I gave up fun for domesticity. This was stupid. I clipped my own wings. I like to wear pretty dresses. I like to wander around clubs. I like to drink tequila and meet interesting people who also like to meet interesting people.
  
  
• I love living life. I am in search of others who love living life to the fullest. People like that never attempt to damper that which is fun. They value living and want other people to enjoy the ride just as much as they do.
  
  
• Schedule.
  This weekend: NJ
  Weekend after that: Florida by way of Atlanta
  Weekend after that: NY
  Weekend after that: OMG. Unknown.....
  
  
• Confessions of the Other Woman.
  Okay, not quite.
  I can't keep yo ass cuz
  A) You gotta girlfriend,
  B) You're a cheater,
  C) You live wit discontent in yo soul.
  
  Always searchin 4 the next thing is no way to live. You'll never be happy. I'm no walk in the park. If you think your girl a pain in the ass, trust bitch, I'm worse. She cares about you. I don't... I have (as of now) no feelings for anyone. I have apparently dissociated due to my last breakup and I feel smmmsh :-,. I love my home girls, and my family. That is all. I feel not for anyone else. Specially not niggas in need of savin. Fuck you. I aint yo mama.
  
  
• My favorite thing from the movie "Forgetting Sarah Marshall"
  
  
  
  "When life gives you lemons, just say 'Fuck the lemons,' and bail."
  
  
• Why is it that Every time I tell someone that I was in a car accident they ask "Were you drinking?"
  
  NO. No one was drinking. It was Saturday Midday and we were all Sober. Unseatbelted and some of us were pantyless but everyone was Sober. Kinda wish I wasn't but that is a whole nother story.
  
  
• The mailman the other day asked me if I saw the movie "White Chicks". I am actually strongly opposed to that movie and this is why:
  Guy at the movie store said I should see it.
  I said No.
  He said "Its funny".
  I said "I don't think so."
  He said "Why?"
  I said "What is funny about seeing 2 dudes dress up like vapid white chicks. Would it be funny to watch 2 old white ladies dress up like 2 black men... No. I think not...."
  
  
• ELECTION RANDOMS
  
  • I'm trying to have a threesome with Joe Six Pack & Joe Plumber (Call me!)
    
    
  • McCain is real old. Really really old. Did you really say that we need to stop worryin bout certifyin and educatin teachers and just get em up in schools. Did you really use the DC public school system as a positive educational example? Do you really think is acceptable to portray someone as a terrorist cuz his middle name is Hussein?
    
    
  • Palin is dumb. Really really dumb. Apparently if I curbed my outrageous spending and instead of gettin that 350,000 dollar house, got that 100,000 dollar house, the economy wouldn't be fucked up. That 100,000 dollar house is a trailer. I seent it. And there is a nomad tribe of crackheads living in it. That's what you get for 100,000 dollars.
    
    Also, if Obama "pals around with terrorists..." So do I.
    When I was in highschool, I was student aide to the below pictured Teacher:
    
    Ms. Malone. History and Peace Studies.
    
    Ms. Malone used to be a Nun. She also was one of the DC Nine. The DC Nine were involved in War protests and specifically:
    

    The undisputed evidence showed that on Saturday, March 22, 1969, appellants broke into the locked fourth floor Dow offices at 1030 - 15th Street, N.W., Washington, D.C., threw papers and documents about the office and into the street below, vandalized office furniture and equipment, and defaced the premises by spilling about a blood-like substance. The prosecution proved its case through Dow employees who testified as to the lack of permission and extent of damage, members of the news media who had been summoned to the scene by the appellants and who witnessed the destruction while recording it photographically, and police officers who arrested appellants on the scene.....

    
    
    Her conviction was knocked down from a felony to a misdemeanor, hence her ability to teach at a Montgomery County School. Yeah. I'm badass. I pal around with terrorists.... Yeah.
    
    Palin, if you have international relations experience due to your proximity to Russia... then I too have international relations experience and more than enough experience to renegotiate trade agreements. Ill play around with CAFTA all day, cuz you know I spent that week in Cancun that time....
    
    Also, your baby either isn't yours or you're a heartless cold blooded bitch for cuttin Alaska's special education budget. You are also a shitty liar. I hope Obama gets in and makes your life hell for tellin people that he pals around with terrorists.
    
    
  • Obama. I like the site where you kiss on babies. Its cute.... Also, Your wife has a Phatty. I'd hit... I'd also hit Palin, but I'd duct tape her first.
    
    
  • Biden... I think you are a lil sexy.. Perhaps it is the fact that you are knowledgeable. or Perhaps its all those suits and hot ties... Yeah. Politics turn me on alil. I'd still give Howard Dean some...
    
    
  • I voted the other day. Did anybody know that Nader was running?
    
    
    I sure didn't.
  
  
  
• I am an acquired taste. I'm not for everybody. Like Lychee or sesame candy. You either love me or hate me....
  
  
• I am in the process of Pretending everything is the same, when in fact it isn't. Everything has changed, but it looks the same on the outside and feels the same on the inside. I can pretend for only so long, cuz I know that eventually it will all fall apart and I'll be back where I was before... Broken.
  
  

I gotta get on my GRE right about now. Cuz I'm getting restless... and when I'm restless, I get into trouble....

PS!!!! I just got hooked on this DJ. DJ JAY XKLUSIVE. I randomly downloaded his mix and it made my day. Check it out.
DJ Jay XKLUSIVE - HALLOWEEN MIX
Libra Fest Finale Mix
Feel Free to stalk him via Facebook : Jay DjXklusive Raymos